5 things I wish I could tell myself as a first time mum

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Having a baby is the most wonderful, stressful, exhausting and mind blowing thing ever to happen in your life. I am one of those people who genuinely loves being a mummy and everything that comes with mummy territory (soft play and everything) but how I am now with D is completely different to how I was when I had K. The whole “second baby, second nature” quote really rings true and I wish I could almost rewind back to when I had K and give myself the advice that I know now. Second time round you are a lot more flexible, a lot more relaxed and you do what you want to do.

Here is the advice I wish I had given myself two years ago…

  1. Pay absolutely no attention to Google or Netmums. I don’t think it mattered what K did as a baby, whether it be spitting up after her milk (obviously reflux or a milk allergy!- cheers Google) or how old they should be when they hit a certain milestone. I looked for reassurance in one of the above websites on the internet. I’ve come to realise that actually, Google nor Netmums doesn’t hold the answer you are looking for. Usually the answer lies within your instinct. They don’t look too well? they probably aren’t -take them to a dr. They haven’t sat up yet? They will in their own time. It really is hard as a first time mum not to search the internet for answers to everything as these little humans don’t come with an instruction manual but if your unsure of something use your instinct or ask a professional.
  2. Savour every tiny little second of that newborn stage as it really really goes in the blink of an eye. Something that I didn’t quite realise with K. I was forever wishing her life away in one respect or another. “oh I can’t wait for her to sit up” “oh I can’t wait for her to walk” “oh it will be amazing when she talks”. Little did I know, all those stages come super duper fast and before I knew it, my little newborn is a stomping two and a half year old. Please – cherish it whilst you can. Let them lie on your chest just that little bit longer.
  3. The night feeds suck…really suck – but you wont be doing them forever. As hard as it is to imagine, this little milk machine WILL stop wanting feeds during the night at some point. Get through it by whatever means possible (a cup of tea and a chocolate biscuit helps *ahem*)
  4. Sleep when they sleep. This is the biggest piece of advice I give to new mums now because when they are asleep we feel that’s our chance to catch up with TV/housework/whatever….NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SLEEP!!! I never took that advice 1st time round but I would kill for it now. Having your second baby means you can never sleep when they sleep because you have a toddler to look after and some times it’s painstakingly exhausting. I sometimes long to go back to the one baby days so I can sleep when they sleep! – Please, let the cobwebs lie and get some rest.
  5. You’re doing OK. You are a kick ass woman that has grown a tiny human being in your womb for 9 months then got them out again (by whatever means possible). They’ve tipped your world upside down, left you sleep deprived, probably a stone or two heavier, made your nipples bleed and they’ve made you question your sanity. But at the end of the day when the night draws in, you are both here to tell the tale, your baby is safe and happy and they are loved. YOU ARE AWSOME. High five yourself.

What advice would you give to yourself as a first time mum? I’d love to hear from you!

XOXOXO

 

 

17 Comments

  1. laura dove 17th February 2016 / 19:31

    Great advice! My advice to myself as a first time mum would be to trust my own instincts. I was very worried about listening to the health visitor and the midwives and friends and family, I wish I had just believed in myself a little more. Now, five babies later, I very much believe in a mothers instinct and am much more confident in trusting my own choices and decisions. Thanks for sharing, #sharewithme

    • Collette 18th February 2016 / 09:58

      That’s brilliant! Yes, mothers instinct is certainly the prime one! thank you for reading xx

  2. Lindsay At Newcastle Family Life 17th February 2016 / 21:06

    I totally agree with cherishing every second as the time really does just go so fast. I wish that I could relive the baby days again and enjoy and cherish them more xx#sharewithme

    • Collette 18th February 2016 / 09:57

      Absolutely! I think you miss a lot of the first born baby days as you don’t cherish them the way you should and worry about everything. It’s only with your second that you realise how fast it goes xx

  3. Jenny 23rd February 2016 / 21:30

    Absolutely fab advice for a first time mom. I think the sleep one is huge. We are all silly enough to think we will just get this laundry and dishes done and then do this while they sleep and where do we recharge NEVER. Great tips. Thank you so much for linking up to Share With Me. I hope to see you again tomorrow for another great roundup! #sharewithme

  4. Talya 26th February 2016 / 13:11

    Great advice! If only ourselves now had known ourselves then eh? Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub lovely x

    • Collette 26th February 2016 / 14:20

      I know! We would kick ass at everything! Thank you for reading lovely xx

  5. Chilli Regina 17th January 2017 / 08:34

    Yes, these are all great tips and advice, but it’s unfortunate that we realize all of it after the first two or three years! I guess it’s a process of motherhood and we have to go trough it and then look from a distance to see the meaning of it. It’s funny how life can play tricks on us;)) #TwinklyTuesday

    • Collette 17th January 2017 / 17:40

      I know I agree! It’s like anything in life though isn’t it!? If only we knew then what we know now! Thanks for reading xx

  6. Sarah Howe runjumpscrap 17th January 2017 / 15:55

    I agree with a lot of this as my second is 4 months old. I definitely treasured that newborn stage and snuggled in front of the telly with her. I’m more chilled, not cared about the odd bit of co-sleeping and she is so much more chilled xx #twinklytuesday

    • Collette 17th January 2017 / 17:38

      Ahh that’s lovely! We are much more confident the second time around. Confident, happy mummy = confident, happy baby! Thanks for reading xx

  7. The Tale of Mummyhood 17th January 2017 / 20:21

    Google should definitely be banned! I googled every little thing and almost drove myself insane x

    #DreamTeam

    • Collette 18th January 2017 / 15:49

      haha I googled and “researched” on Netmums. Neither an ideal choice! haha. Thanks for reading xx

  8. Crummy Mummy 19th January 2017 / 13:38

    I’m about to be a third time mum and my advice would be to rest as much as possible – the tiredness WILL catch up with you #twinklytuesday

    • Collette 19th January 2017 / 14:21

      Oh god! I can imagine!! Hope your practicing what your preaching! 🙂 xx

  9. Lisa (mummascribbles) 21st January 2017 / 15:04

    Definitely the sleep one but all of these are great tips. I’ve only been a second time mum for four months but feel so much more relaxed this time – except for right now when I’m googling what’s normal or chicken pox in babies! Thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday

    • Collette 21st January 2017 / 15:25

      Oh bless you!! I’ve not been plagued with the pox yet but I’m preparing myself for it! I hope your little one is well soon. The odd “dr google” on this occasion totally doesn’t count 😉 thanks for reading xx

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