Motherhood. The good, the bad and the eye bags

It’s 3am and the house is quiet. Everyone’s asleep (or trying to sleep) all except for me and Dylan. It’s the 5th time I’ve had to get up with him since I went to bed at 10pm. I’m not sure what’s unsettling him. I don’t know whether he’s teething, he’s feeling unwell or whether he just wants some company.

What I do know is that I’m the only one at this hour that can comfort him.

As he lays there on my chest, his head rested on my shoulder he instantly relaxes. Whatever was bothering him seems to bother him no longer so long as he’s in my arms. When I think he’s drifted off to sleep I try to gently lay him back in his cot only for him to cry again. It really is exhausting. I never had sleeping issues with my daughter. She was always such a good little sleeper and even now she sleeps 7:30pm-7:30am. I wrote in a post a couple of weeks ago (Dylan – You are 17 months old) that, after 17 long months of wakeful nights, you had finally cracked the sleeping through bit. Well that post came back to bite me on the arse because he’s not slept through since!

What is it about little ones needing you? It’s a mothering battle that I will never win. On one hand I’m at the end of my tether, praying that tonight will be the night he sleeps through and on the other hand I feel an overwhelming sense of love and softness when it’s the still of the night and it’s only us two. Nestled in each other, not making a sound and just enjoying the quiet cuddles. It’s like our own special club. I feel like I’m needed and that I serve a purpose. I remind myself that these moments, however exhausting they are, won’t last forever.

The days without sleep are hard. My patience is short, my energy levels are zapped and I have bags under my eyes big enough to carry the weekly shop in.

But you just cope don’t you?

You do whatever you can to survive and get through the day and do it all again the next night. Because that’s what motherhood, or parenthood, is. It’s surviving. It’s about winging it at every opportunity. You pray to the big man upstairs that tonight will be the night that you get more than a 2 hour stretch of sleep before you have to get up again and when you hear those faint little cry’s (that soon turn it to extra loud wails if your not quick enough!) your heart sinks a little bit. But as soon as you realise that those cry’s were for you and your touch, every little irritated and exhausted feeling goes straight out of the window. That’s motherhood. It’s the good, the bad and the eye bags all rolled in to one and do you know what? I wouldn’t have it any other way! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What’s in my toddler changing bag

I wrote a blog post a while back about what was in my baby changing bag (What’s in my change bag) and it had quite a lot of interest so I thought I’d do an updated version now Dylan is out of the baby stage and very much in the toddler stage.

What is it about wanting to know what people carry around with them? I personally love it! I love seeing what people have when out and about. It gives me a bit of inspiration and makes me think if I’ve got everything I need. Almost like a visual checklist. I also like “What’s in my handbag” posts from the ladies out there but I don’t know if that’s me bordering on the line of insane. What do you think!? Anyway!…

When babies become toddlers, it is a relief to all mums out there that you don’t need to carry around with you the whole bumph that comes with having a baby.

I decided that because I didn’t need as much stuff, I didn’t need the large change bag that I had (although I loved it) So I purchased this dinosaur print from Cath Kidston. I am a HUGE Cath Kidston fan and I have a lot of her bags so I felt this one was perfect. It had Dinosaurs on to please Dylan and a Cath Kidston label to please me. Everyone’s a winner! Except probably, my husband. God bless him. He doesn’t feel the Cath Kidston love the way I do. Nevertheless, he still wears it when out and about with our son.

So what’s in my changing bag?

  1. Nappies. I usually take 3 out with me. Three being the magic number and all. I’m never out long enough to use all 3 so I’ve never had a “no nappy” crisis.
  2. Wipes. Used for cleaning everything but the kitchen sink. Unlike nappies, I have to be brand specific with these as for some reason Dylan has a reaction to all wipes except Pampers sensitive and Mamia (Aldi) sensitive wipes.
  3. Tissues. For those snotty, snotty noses. I can’t bare a green encrusted nose.
  4. A Change of clothes. I like to keep a spare pair of trousers and pants for Katie in the bag too in case of any accidents.
  5. A Change mat. A Cath Kidston change mat which one of my friends kindly gave me.
  6. Juice and snacks. Always important with Children. I try to keep healthy snacks in my bag but sometimes only a milky bar will do.
  7. A toy. Used purely as a distraction tool. The toys changes from week to week as does Dylan’s interests. This week it’s lightening Mcqueen.
  8. A dummy. For nap times and tantrums.
  9.  My purse and phone. I don’t carry my own bag it drives me nuts having to lug two bags around (3 if Katie’s at nursery and has her nursery bag) So I just put my purse and phone in to the change bag. Sometimes I carry a lipstick too but if we’re being honest, I’m never one to remember to top my lippy up during the day anyway so it’s sometimes a pointless product.

That’s it in my changing bag. The contents has dwindled dramatically from the baby days. I hate it when your baby isn’t your baby  anymore but I am glad when you don’t have to be armed with all the products that going out with a baby entails.

What do you keep in your changing bag? Do I carry more or less than you?

I’d love to hear from you!

 

 

 

Dylan – You are 17 months old (A letter to my son)

My Darling Dylan you are now 17 months old,

It’s just a quick one. When I wrote your 16 month update (Dylan-you are 16 months old) I said that I wouldn’t write to you every month after that.

But, you’ve had a couple of changes which I feel you need to know about.

Firstly, you’ve slept through the night! And not just one night but every night for a whole week! Halleluiah!  I’m wondering if this is finally the turning point in your sleeping pattern. (It’s only took 17 months!) I’m starting to feel like a new woman. I was starting to think this day would never come! It’s amazing what a full nights sleep does for everyone. Including you.

Secondly, we’ve had a bit of a turn around at the dinner table too. I wrote in your 16 month update that you were particularly fussy when it came to eating your food at teatime but over the last couple of weeks we’ve changed you from a high chair to a booster seat so you can sit at the table properly with us and you’ve started to use a fork to feed yourself with and it’s made such a difference! Not all the time, but enough for meal times not to be as stressful as they were. It’s so lovely to watch you try and use a fork. You try to be so independent. The look on you face when you manage to put a piece of food from the fork in to your mouth is utter triumph. Your such a clever little thing.

Your walking has improved vastly over the last week and you are practically running everywhere now. You have such speed behind you I’m forever telling you to slow down. It goes without saying that you’ve also had quite a few bumps to the head since you developed the speed too. Silly little Dylan, you’ll never learn as I rub and kiss it better.

I said it was just a quick letter this month Dylan and I meant it. I’ll leave it here. Your a bit under the weather today and Daddy and I are hoping that you haven’t caught the Chicken Pox from your sister. I’m off to go and give you a cuddle.

Keep up the good work Darling.

We love you.

 

 

The Siblings Project (February 2017)

I love doing the Siblings post every month! It must be, by far, my easiest post to write. The post I feel most confident about. I love being able to take pictures of my two together so that I have something to show them when they are older and something that I can look back on with fond memories.

I’ve noticed their bond changing slightly over the last few months. Although they are still as close as ever and they love each other dearly, Dylan is moving out of the baby stage and very much in to the toddler stage. This in turn, has meant that there has been a lot more squabbling! Sometimes it’s over toys. Sometimes it’s over TV programmes. We are getting to the stage where they are even close to squabbling about who got what food!

It’s a tricky stage as a mum. It’s hard not to tell them off for squabbling with one another, but I still have to remember that Dylan doesn’t understand his actions as much as Katie does. It’s not long before they kiss and make up and are back to giggling with one another though.

I mentioned last month (January 2017) that Katie was enjoying the fact that Dylan was getting older. It meant that he could play with her a little bit more. This still stands. I’m finding that I can leave them in the playroom for a little while knowing that they will just play nicely and not get up to too much mischief. I still have to remind Katie that although Dylan can play more it doesn’t mean that he can do everything that she can! I caught her trying to teach him how to catapult himself of the sofa at the start of the week. I’ll quickly skip past that!!

I say this every month, but I can not wait for the better weather to come. It means that I can photography my little ones outside more in what I like to call their natural habitat!

 

 

What do your children say? An interview with my 3 year old

What do your children say? I was scanning Pinterest the other day (find me here) when I came across a blog post idea that I thought was great! An interview with your child on their birthday every year. It’s a way to document their answers and see how they change as they get older. I thought this was a fantastic idea so I decided to interview Katie and see what answers she gave me. When I decided to interview her, she was laid in bed watching a video on her tablet. This is her way of having quiet time in an afternoon.

Interview with Katie – 7th February 2017

What is your name? “Katie”

How old are you? “3”

How old is Mummy? “12” – Not quite, love

How old is Daddy? “13, I know that because you told me he was older than you so that makes him 13” – Your logic is correct, your answer isn’t.

What is your favourite colour? “Pink”

What is your favourite toy? “Erm…Rabbit” (A comforter she’s had since she was a baby)

What do you want to be when you grow up? “A trainer, so I can drive trains”

Do you mean a train driver? “Yes, I want to be a train driver”

What’s your favourite TV show? “Peppa Pig”

What’s your favourite DVD? “Rapunzel” (Tangled)

What’s the best thing about Mummy? “Your cuddles”

What’s the best thing about Daddy? “He spins me around really fast”

What’s your favourite drink? “Apple juice”

What’s your favourite animal? “OW! I’ve got a chicken pox in my ear!!” (She’s currently got Chicken pox if you’d not already guessed)

What’s your favourite animal? “A Cow”

What’s your favourite fruit? “Grapes”

What’s your favourite thing to eat at lunchtime? “Cheese sandwiches”

What’s your favourite thing to do outdoors? “Play football”

“I’ve accidently got chocolate on my bed, Mummy”

Who’s your best friend? “Hollie”

Do you like doing questions like this? “Yes, but you didn’t ask me who my favourite ever person was!”

Who’s your favourite ever person? “I don’t know”

 

This interview was so fun to do, it’s interesting to see what answers they give and how easily they can go off on a tangent. I love how I could ask the same set of questions when she’s 4 years old and get completely different answers. Although, I bet if I asked Katie these questions again tomorrow I’d still get different answers too!

Why don’t you ask these questions to your children and see what they come out with? I’d love to hear what they say!

 

 

 

 

 

Diary of an imperfect mum