Coping with two children under the age of 3

Coping with two under 3

I always knew I wanted to be a mum, it was always in my “life plan”. I also knew that I wanted them to be close in age so that they could grow up together and maybe be best friends. I’ve mentioned before that I’ll never quite know if my family is complete and the prospect of a 3rd child will always be somewhat of a question mark but for now I’m happy with the two I’ve got. There’s 2 years and 3 months between the two of them and it’s quite tricky sometimes having two children under the age of 3. I know there are plenty of people out there who have smaller age gaps between their children and I have the upmost respect for them. It’s not easy no matter what the age gap but I’ve wrote down a few of my tips that help me cope looking after two small children.

Get out of the house – It genuinely doesn’t matter where you go, or what you really do so long as you spend a portion of your day (everyday) out of the house. Go to the park, baby groups, supermarket anything. My worst days with two children are the days where I’ve been couped up in the house.

Allow more time – This goes hand in hand with the above advice. It takes me twice as long (if not more) to get 3 of us ready and out than it ever did when I had just one child. Allow plenty of time so you don’t end up barking orders at your children.

Spend quality time with each of them – When D takes a nap in a morning I always make sure I stop whatever I’m doing and get on the floor and play with my daughter. It gives us quality time where she has my undivided attention without the distraction of a baby. Likewise, K still goes to her grandparents on Mondays and Fridays as these are the days I used to work so it gives me one to one time with D.

Keep on track with the housework Something I’m still trying to master! My house will never be a show home of any sort and will always be that little bit cluttered but it’s a typical loving family home. It’s hard work making sure that the children and hubby are taken care of and the house is running smoothly and as I’ve already stated, I’ve probably dropped the ball a few times when it comes to the housework but trying to keep on top of the endless washing piles and dirty dishes makes your home life run that little bit more smoothly meaning that ultimately you get more free time to spend with your children. 30 minutes per day should ensure that everything is ship shape.

Have “me” time – This is so important yet most of us don’t do it. I know I don’t do it half as much as I should for fear of feeling self indulgent but something as simple as a hot soak in the bath once the kids have gone to bed will help you relax and regroup. A happy mummy makes for a happy home!

XOXOXO

5 things I wish I could tell myself as a first time mum

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Having a baby is the most wonderful, stressful, exhausting and mind blowing thing ever to happen in your life. I am one of those people who genuinely loves being a mummy and everything that comes with mummy territory (soft play and everything) but how I am now with D is completely different to how I was when I had K. The whole “second baby, second nature” quote really rings true and I wish I could almost rewind back to when I had K and give myself the advice that I know now. Second time round you are a lot more flexible, a lot more relaxed and you do what you want to do.

Here is the advice I wish I had given myself two years ago…

  1. Pay absolutely no attention to Google or Netmums. I don’t think it mattered what K did as a baby, whether it be spitting up after her milk (obviously reflux or a milk allergy!- cheers Google) or how old they should be when they hit a certain milestone. I looked for reassurance in one of the above websites on the internet. I’ve come to realise that actually, Google nor Netmums doesn’t hold the answer you are looking for. Usually the answer lies within your instinct. They don’t look too well? they probably aren’t -take them to a dr. They haven’t sat up yet? They will in their own time. It really is hard as a first time mum not to search the internet for answers to everything as these little humans don’t come with an instruction manual but if your unsure of something use your instinct or ask a professional.
  2. Savour every tiny little second of that newborn stage as it really really goes in the blink of an eye. Something that I didn’t quite realise with K. I was forever wishing her life away in one respect or another. “oh I can’t wait for her to sit up” “oh I can’t wait for her to walk” “oh it will be amazing when she talks”. Little did I know, all those stages come super duper fast and before I knew it, my little newborn is a stomping two and a half year old. Please – cherish it whilst you can. Let them lie on your chest just that little bit longer.
  3. The night feeds suck…really suck – but you wont be doing them forever. As hard as it is to imagine, this little milk machine WILL stop wanting feeds during the night at some point. Get through it by whatever means possible (a cup of tea and a chocolate biscuit helps *ahem*)
  4. Sleep when they sleep. This is the biggest piece of advice I give to new mums now because when they are asleep we feel that’s our chance to catch up with TV/housework/whatever….NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SLEEP!!! I never took that advice 1st time round but I would kill for it now. Having your second baby means you can never sleep when they sleep because you have a toddler to look after and some times it’s painstakingly exhausting. I sometimes long to go back to the one baby days so I can sleep when they sleep! – Please, let the cobwebs lie and get some rest.
  5. You’re doing OK. You are a kick ass woman that has grown a tiny human being in your womb for 9 months then got them out again (by whatever means possible). They’ve tipped your world upside down, left you sleep deprived, probably a stone or two heavier, made your nipples bleed and they’ve made you question your sanity. But at the end of the day when the night draws in, you are both here to tell the tale, your baby is safe and happy and they are loved. YOU ARE AWSOME. High five yourself.

What advice would you give to yourself as a first time mum? I’d love to hear from you!

XOXOXO